The decomposing human bodies moving in a vibrant language. Sending signals

in unfortunate ways, (through unstable tones.) Just enough to kow that there is no recovery. How can I even compare? (I'm hiding out. Shaving my head. I'm screening calls. Covering my tracks.) I want to form some sort of expression. I want to make some sense out of this. Without calculating the collective, I want to know everything. Sometimes I don't want to scream and sometimes I don't want to be around here. Sometimes I just want to pilot a giant robot, spending days that only exist in my head. Instead of excuses I will be looking for reasons, Finding passion in my own instead of convenience.